2002-08-08|10:40 a.m.
I got up earlier than everyone in my house again. I followed Holden out to the living room where he loves to sit near the window to sun bathe. Near the window is A�s record player and on it was James Taylor�s Greatest Hits. So, being one of those sort of mornings that you wake from a bad night, I felt inclined to play it.
It was when �Fire and Rain� came on that my mind starting waking up. I remembered the James Taylor concert that MZ took me to. I remembered him telling me that day walking through USC that the song was about JT�s time in a mental institution for drug abuse. There JT met a girl who became his close friend. The song is written the day after he found out she committed suicide. He talks about all the things in life he has seen and how each day they pass, but in no way did he think that he�d never see her again.
This song always makes me cry.
I imagine those I care about so much and those I have lost. I imagine the state one must be in to do the thing she did. I imagine what those words of grief sound like in my mouth. I even sing along.
I guess I will be ok. In a lot of ways I am just a little kid. The harsh realities of the world still shock me with the same intensity of that day that Charlene said that her dad was imprisoned. I wonder if I will ever better accept it.
�Just yesterday morning they let me know you were gone
Susanne the plans they made put an end to you
I walked out this morning and I wrote down this song
I just can't remember who to send it to�