2003-10-18|11:41 a.m.
I�m not feeling so good. My mom just told me that she wants me to get rid of my dog.
We went to Mexico yesterday and a childhood friend of hers came down with us and spent the night after we returned. And since she�s a stranger to our home, Holden doesn�t like her and because he was left in the house he bit her.
It�s not a bad bite. But he has bitten people before. I don�t want to in any way imply that I condone my dog�s behavior, but it is some what of a fact that he bites people he doesn�t know and trust.
This is why I tell my mom to put him outside. There�s no training him. We�ve tried everything. And my mom refuses to scold him at all. She only wants to spoil him and feed him people-food and make him grossly obese.
Needless to say, I don�t like what�s become of this situation. I am at the mercy of my mom because I�ve moved in here and it�s her house. But like being at the mercy of anyone, it sucks.
My mom wants me to bring him to A�s mom�s house and leave him there. First, that�s assuming a lot. A�s mom isn�t going to want him there in her back yard. And A�s mom lives two and a half hours from my house so me taking care of him is out of the question. Plus, A�s mom lives in the Mojave Desert and Holden will simply stay outside there for the rest of his life and become like every dog that�s been forgotten in that backyard�a zombie.
This whole thing is making me think I need to move out. But I have no money because I spend all my time doing things that don�t make me money like going to school and volunteering at a non-profit who can�t afford to pay anyone who makes it work. To be honest, I don�t even know how I could get a job to work around my school schedule as it is at all. I�d end up working at like Circle K at midnight selling booze to alcoholics and meat-head jocks and would see my grades fail from working so much I couldn�t get any of my school work done.
So, she�s handing me this ultimatum. I can either send my dog to get ear infections (from the desert sand in his ears) and to neglect and see him only on the rare times I drive up there OR move out and pay for the long term costs against school of working fulltime again to afford to live somewhere on my own.
And I am so sad and stressed right now. In other things related to Holden, he�s been having these seizures and they�ve become more frequent. And I can�t afford to pay 400 bucks or more to take him to a vet but if I don�t he could die from one of them I was told.
Abe got this dog about three years ago and after getting bored with all animals he ever gets, Holden became my dog. And I have to admit, it�s really like he�s my good friend. I am a busy person and I can�t always pay attention to him, but I see him everyday and we play even for only a bit at least. He loves me and does a dance every time I come home. And I've done god knows how much to pay for vet bills and find homes in which we could both live. And though he may be a jerk to new people and not mind very well, I deal with it because he is my friend. I love him.
I�ll not be ok if any of this happens. As it is, I am not doing all that well.