2002-01-21|10:22 a.m.
Another long wait until I confess my latest anecdote. I�m sure I was missed.
Well, the heartbreak was over something silly, something I shouldn�t have been sad over. Remember that courier bag boy. Well, his name is Jeff. I just recently asked. Well, I got brave and made him a card on Christmas Eve and gave it to him. It said simply, �Let�s be friends.� And on the bottom I wrote down my email address and AIM screen name. I waited forever for him to write. I checked my email multiple times a day. I never received anything from him. I also didn�t see him in almost two weeks. Sometimes it goes like that. I only see him when I happen to be downstairs when he is there, or I forget to get the courier bag ready on time and have to bring it to him. To put it simply, I felt heartbroken. I was convinced that he found me too forward, or worse, repulsive. My small crush on this guy had sent me down.
Remember, A and I are working on things. Actually, it has been fairly nice. So, I really shouldn�t try to be friends with a boy I find attractive. But, I couldn�t help feeling a need to be his friend. I also have promised myself I will be honest to him, bluntly if possible, for my sake.
So, last week he shows up while I am downstairs and tells me that he hopes I wasn�t insulted because he never wrote, because he doesn�t have internet access (What a dope I am right?). And that he is sorry. So, I confess that it does make me feel better. And the next time I see him he tells me that he is writing me a letter.
I think it would be really nice if we did end up being friends. Maybe it was better that I got all these silly feelings out of the way first, too.
School�s first week is completed. Today is Martin Luther King Jr.�s Day, and for it I am relaxing till I have to go to work this afternoon. I am taking two political science classes in international policy, an introductory astronomy class, public speaking, cultural geography, and self defense. I think I am going to get worn out fast, but at least they are things I am more interested in.
I have to send my grades from last semester to all the UC's I applied to. I am scared to send my �C� in statistics.
I miss MM. He has gone back to LA. Why can�t I kidnap people and not feel selfish for it?
Word of the day: frigorific- causing cold/ chilling