2002-07-30|2:26 p.m.
Yeah, so I am tired of working here. Last Sunday they gave me the job of covering cosmetics for eight hours without a list of things to do. One girl came up to me that works there and said, �Man, I feel sorry for you. Cosmetics is the worst place to work. I once straightened it three times in an eight hour shift.� I decided then and there I�d ask to go home early. Besides, Bear Wolf, my old Native American Literature professor invited A and me to go down and see him perform at a poetry slam six miles from where we live. So, I asked. The manager was pretty irritated, but he let me go. I only had to straighten the department twice. I think the third time would have meant the end of my sanity. Why would you bother employing someone to do that? Their whole purpose becomes making things look as if they are full and neat. I know. I shouldn�t be such a jerk about it. Someone else is cleaning toilets. And, why should I feel superior to any type of work? I don�t know. I just can�t stand it anymore.
But, it doesn�t mean I am leaving. Unless of course, they boot me out. I am sucked in by the 401K plan, health benefits, and dollar more an hour on Sundays. Plus, I�ll have been there almost four years. Can I throw job security away like that?
I am a coward. I am a coward about everything that should mean something in my life. And the sad thing is that doesn�t really alarm me all that much. It is the disconnected feeling in me that grows each day that sort of bothers me. Everything I used to love has become an onus. I�ve stopped reading. I�ve nearly stopped writing. I only work and sleep.
I guess on the brighter side I could tell you about the poetry slam. It was pretty fun. Bear Wolf was really amazing. And I was one of the five judges for the thing, so it felt pretty great to be able to give a perfect �10� when he astounded us all. He ended up getting second place. And the competition was pretty intense. Here is the site for the San Diego Poetry Slam .
Word of the Day: onus- burden/ a disagreeable necessity or obligation